Therapy and support systems can be invaluable resources in addressing the lasting effects of childhood experiences with alcoholic parents. A therapist specializes in helping adult children of alcoholics navigate the healing process. They can provide guidance, coping strategies, and much-needed validation. While there is no one-size-fits-all solution for coping with alcohol misuse, understanding the risk factors can help families develop strategies to mitigate its effects. Educating children about addiction and providing healthy outlets for coping with stress can be beneficial in safeguarding them from developing an alcohol use disorder themselves.

Dysfunction and Conflict in the Family Unit

The feelings, personality traits, and relationship patterns that you developed to cope with an alcoholic parent, come with you to work, romantic relationships, parenting, and friendships. They show up as anxiety, depression, substance abuse, stress, anger, and relationship problems. People who suffer from AUD often experience changes in brain function, mood, and behavior, and may become socially isolated. For alcoholic parents, it can affect the way they communicate and develop relationships with their children as well.

1. In turn, releasing those negative emotions can also reduce some physical health risks, such as heart disease.
2. Their family members — especially children — are usually impacted by alcohol use, too.
3. They’re also more likely to be truant, get suspended and drop out of school.
4. Studies show a correlation between malnutrition and physical abuse in adult children of alcoholics.
5. If you’ve gone through this situation, you’re not alone, and help is available.

What Does It Mean to Be an Adult Child of an Alcoholic (ACoA)?

However, evidence suggests that higher levels of impulsivity and sensitivity may be common. A personality prone to impulsivity may make it more challenging to resist using substances, especially during times of high stress. High sensitivity, in turn, may make someone more vulnerable to life stressors and challenging circumstances, increasing the risk they turn to substances to cope. Anyone of any age, gender, social status, race, class, ethnicity, and identity can experience a dependency on alcohol. Additionally, alcohol addiction is around 45 to 65% hereditary, meaning those whose parents abuse alcohol or have a drug problem may have a higher risk of experiencing dependency themselves. This lack of emotional support can lead to feelings of abandonment, loneliness and worthlessness in children.

They will come to understand that their past cannot be changed, but they can unlearn their harmful coping mechanisms, tend to their childhood trauma and find “a sense of wholeness they never knew was possible.” Another personality trait is “the scapegoat,” which is when the children of alcoholics receive the blame for their parent’s addiction. Unfortunately, these children are blamed and made to feel less than because of their parent’s addiction, even though they have no control over their parents’ addictions. This can lead to a child growing up and struggling with low self-worth and self-esteem because they were blamed and belittled for their parent’s addiction. They may care little for the experiences of their aging parents or other family members. The determining factors of what makes someone selfish likely vary from family to family due to individual or cultural differences.

A 2012 study that considered 359 adult children of parents with AUD found that they tended to fall within five distinct personality subtypes. One of these types, termed Awkward/Inhibited by researchers, was characterized by feelings of inadequacy and powerlessness. As your parent’s child, you are not responsible for fixing or healing your parent. Another adult may be able to refer your parent to a program or resource in your community. If you are experiencing emotional, verbal, physical, or sexual abuse from your parent with alcohol dependency, tell your other parent or a trusted adult as soon as possible. Studies show a correlation between malnutrition and physical abuse in adult children of alcoholics.

I’m In Recovery

This terminology arises frequently when we discuss people from marginalized groups, often utilizing the term as a “positive” talking point and sometimes as a goal. The danger in this definition is the removal of the breadth of experiences that children of parents with SUD have. With therapy and support, ACOAs can make changes in their life and treat the underlying PTSD and trauma. Talk therapy one-on-one or group counseling, somatic experiencing, and EMDR are highly effective in addressing the signs of trauma and developing new, healthy coping mechanisms. Research shows that a child’s risk of becoming an alcoholic is greater if their alcoholic parent is depressed or suffers from other co-occurring disorders. Their risk also goes up if both parents are addicted to alcohol and other drugs, if the alcohol abuse is severe and if there is violence in the home.

These children have a 95 percent chance of developing mental health problems such as anxiety and depression. They also are at high risk for attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder, substance abuse and suicide. Eventually and with the help of others, adult children will come to view alcoholism and other drug addiction as a disease and family dysfunction as the inevitable result.

Explain your concern and let the person know how your parent’s behavior impacts you. Your family may be able to reach out to your parent and discuss treatment options with them. If you or someone you know is living with alcoholism, seeking help is crucial. Family therapy can provide a safe space to discuss issues and build healthier family dynamics.

You struggle to express yourself, subconsciously remembering how unsafe it was to speak up in your family. People who grow up Alcohol-Related Blackouts in alcoholic households are more likely to develop or marry someone with AUD themselves. Exposure to alcohol and substance use disorders affects children in their development and throughout their lives.